The Definition of Sleep Deprivation

If you Google "methods of torture," the first result that comes up is a Wikipedia entry.  Under Psychological Torture, you'll find Sleep Deprivation.  It has been ruled inhumane according to the European Convention on Human Rights and has been used as an interrogation method by government agencies worldwide.  The good news is that DH and I would be excellent recruits for undercover agents since, if caught by an enemy and subjected to sleep deprivation, we would be unbreakable.

Back to Wikipedia.  If you click on Sleep Deprivation, it goes on to list all sorts of maladies that can be attributed to lack of sleep.  There's plenty of mention of sleep disorders, even war, but nowhere does it refer to new parents.  I'm not a Wikipedia contributor, so I'd like to take this opportunity to write my own definition of Sleep Deprivation:

SLEEP DEPRIVATION, n., is the condition of not having enough sleep, mostly found in parents, particularly new parents.  Symptoms include bags under the eyes, irritability, arguing, yawning incessantly, forgetfulness, inability to form complete sentences and trouble understanding basic concepts.  Onset begins with peaceful slumber interrupted by a baby's siren-like cry on the baby monitor.  Sleep is achieved in 3-4 hour blocks maximum over prolonged period of time.  In simpler terms, it's when you finally get baby back to sleep at 4am and then you can't sleep, so you make a cup of tea and figure hey why not wash the cabinets?  It's that foggy-headed feeling like you've just been struck with a 2x4 and haven't gotten your bearings back yet.  It's having no recollection of the middle of the night feeding, just seeing evidence of it the day after.  It's when you're at the grocery store and "Paper or plastic?" is so overwhelming you can only mumble, "I don't know."  It's getting pulled over for drunk driving when you haven't even had a drink.  It's wanting to drop kick the next person who asks "Is she sleeping through the night yet?"  It's getting ready in the morning and forgetting what side you part your hair on.  It's when your eyelids are so heavy they shut without your approval and you can't get them back open.  It's finally getting to take a long nap...only to wake up and feel even more tired than you were before.  

I'm sure Wikipedia would welcome a new parental perspective on their listing.  I'll get right on that.  One of these days when I get enough sleep.